Saturday, December 19, 2009

Seychelles Cartoon - Merry Xmas from Barbarons Seychelles

My dear Seychellois Peasants,

Sarah, the kids and I are enjoying our Xmas holidays so much that we wanted to share a little Christmas cheer with you poor Seychellois. 

At this festive moment when Seychelles is bankrupt and under IMF management, we simply cannot believe how fortunate we are to be living in paradise and enjoying the billions that we have stashed away over the last 32 years.  

The beautifully wrapped presents have been arriving by container loads from all over the world.  From my farmers in Australia, to the friends of the late Mario Ricci in Italy who has sent baskets of their finest salamis and cheeses, a few bottles of wine and cognac from my old socialist friends in France, a little hand made doll from North Korea, some vodka from Russia, some fat cigars from my old Cuban friend Fidel who never forgets me, a little tea-set from China, a beautiful hand-made 9mm revolver with bullets from a Rwandan colonel who prefers not to be named but who never forgot the guns and ammo James and I sold him for the Rwandan massacre, and a lot of flowers, fruits and trinkets from my personal bankers and advisors in all four corners of the world.  

Even locally, cards and even more gifts have been pouring in. From Central Bank to State House, from Changleng to faithful Danny, from all the District Administrators and Lepep Party MNAs to my best old friends from La Digue and CCCL, and of course, from my personal advisor and confidante at Intelvision, Mukesh. He even gave us a free Extravaganza TV Bouquet with some naughty channels that only I can view.  

I tell you, Sarah and I are so blessed and thankful for all these gifts.  Sometimes, I simply cannot believe my luck and good fortune.  To think that I had "tres peu de sous" just a few years ago, and now this.  

But the icing on the cake is of course the cards received from IMF and those guys at Paris Club who have been pardoning some of the debts Mookie, Michel and I created.  And I reckon by 2011, you poor peasants will have forgotten the US$ 2.4 billion that has gone missing from our system and you will once again elect James Michel for another term.  That is, if Seychelles has not already sunk either from the debts or from all the global warming hot air coming from him lately at Copenhagen. I think that James is starting to like that teleprompter just a little bit too much and really thinks that people believe all that rubbish about sinking islands.  Of course, I know first-hand because I grew up on some of those islands.  But I do worry a little too because if our islands disappeared, where would Glenny get my turtle meat from, let alone entertain his Mauritian friends?  Would be a sad Christmas party indeed without my favourite "Cai Torti" and a few Fouket birds on the grill. 

Anyhow, I know that 2009 has been a difficult year for all of you and with Danny's new budget, let me assure you that 2010 will be even more difficult for all of you.  But once again, I call on you to "Ser Sang" just a little bit longer and be a bit more patient.  We will get through these difficult times together and believe me, Michel, Sarah and I really feel your pain and we will be standing by you all the way.  Never think for a minute that we do not love our people.  After all, you made us rich and we are very grateful to you all for keeping us in power for so long. So do you really think we can let you down now?  Never, never, never!

Once again, our family wishes you all a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous 2010.  Bonne Fete!

From Tonton Albert (the great Seychelles architect and leader for life), Sarah (wife number 3 or 4, I'm not too sure myself as Alzheimers is starting to set in), our busty nympha Ella (who has already sent some new sexy pictures of herself to everyone in Seychelles as a gift), and of course the rest of the family, maids, gardeners, cooks, drivers and soldiers at:

10 Cheap Acres
Barbarons Exclusive Estate
Indian Ocean

P.S. We are also cutting back our budget in 2010 as times are really hard and we are doing our best to help the economy.  We will only keep 50 soldiers at the property instead of 75 and also 12 personal bodyguards instead of 15. Poor Sarah has decided to sell 2 of her sports cars to buy new ones because tax has been reduced, so that's her way of contributing as well. After all, this is the least we could do for our country and our people.


Anonymous said...

Brilliant cartoon. I really love the fact that the cartoonist has captured the moment perfectly. Here is a man who has ruined Seychelles and yet he lives an opulent life with no care in the world except to protect his ill-gotten gains. Let us hope that 2010 is really his year. Every dog has its day. Santa Claus

Anonymous said...

Nice picture. The ghosts in the background will haunt him for the rest of his life. Albert Rene is a murderer and James Michel is too and even killed his own son. Let us not forget Simon Desnousse and others who were murdered by these two.They should be hanged like Sadam Husein from the clock tower in Vcitoria. Then we can have peace and enjoy christmas.

Anonymous said...

I resent this last blog regarding the "ten cheap acres". I buy land cheap when I can, but it is from people willing to sell, not my government office.

Officially Scr.65,000.00 was paid to the 10 acres.

That is Scr 6,500.00 per acre, oceanfront property.

This is not stealing, this is thieving.

Besides, Rene needed a home at the time, and could no longer live with Geva Rene.

Perhaps Rene can offer to pay the difference between what he paid and today's real market value for the land. Euro 100.00 per square meter = euro 4,200,000.00 x (SCR) 16.75= Scr 70,350,000.00 (Fair Market Value of Barbaron Estate).

So on this transaction, Rene will owe Scr 70,350,000.00-Scr 65,000.00(already paid) =Scr 70,285,000.00 ;less stamp duty and notary fees etc....

LO should place a motion as a matter of privelege before the National Assembly and cause the Assembly to resolve that Fair Market Value be paid for this transactions and any other that were done under the table.

That would be serious opposition!

Christopher Gill

Anonymous said...

I agree. This would bring some stolen money back into the government and help us pay for the debts that he created. Now that would be a real coup.

Anonymous said...

The key is for the Opposition to be united, and the Opposition place opposing pressure, not remain a lame duck Opposition, with legs crossed and hands in the air.

Anonymous said...

Indeed, a lot of land was expropriated from Seychellois in the early 80s amd many prominent properties got the fate of "gouverman in pran" where the owners got peanuts for a pot of gold which again was sold dead cheap to whoever had the right connections.

I totally agree that the LOP should raise this question in assembly and insist on that these cases are investigated into and the truth is brought forward. Then again, this can only happen of the LOP is clean with regards to his own land purchase deals. Is he?

As to land expropriation, I only know it too well as my forefather's land was also taken by the government and after the multiparty reintro we had to purchase it back from the same people who forced us to sell it. Now back in our hands, our children are once again able to inherit a part of their heritage.

Patrick X

Anonymous said...

I reply to Patrick X

If the LO Mr. Ramkalawan has unclean hands on government land purchases, then you should bring it our in Public and do not hide it in general assumption based statements. When you do that, you weaken the democractic process and the opposition. As you complain about a lame opposition, your own actions assure it will remain so.

I ask you to give us details.

As for LO Ramkalawan, he is free to disclose those transactions and come clean with the public and answer on his own behalf.

Their is nothing "virtual" about that.

Lets have the details or hold our peace.

Christopher Gill

Anonymous said...


If I was the leader of a political party and someone made allegations of me abusing the party's funds I'd open every single account book, show evert receipt and make it all so transparent that they'd forever hold their peace about the matter. And I'd do that without even being asked to do so.

All the bollocks about 'prove it else forever hold you peace' is to me just another attempt of hiding behind the good old 'innocent until proven guilty'. Everybody expects the PL to open their books and show transparency, but it's totally OK for the SNP to show transparency that's as clear as mud.

Besides, it's not up to me to find those irregularities. I believe we have attorneys for that sort of work, not to mention a police force and now even tax authorities.

Patrick X

Anonymous said...

It was just not anyone who accused Wavel Ramkalawan of dabbling in party funds, it was the Treasurer of the SNP, Mrs Soundy.

It is as if Danny Faure had done the same thing vis a vis James Michel, if that happened then people like Christopher Gill would have jumping up and down roof tops with that!

Let me see you explain that one away Mr Gill.

Anonymous said...

I think Wavel bought his piece of land as land bank,this is easily verifiable by searching the Land Registar but thought i believe it may be unfair to begrudge him since the price was set by the Government.

As a matter of principle, i think he ought to have abstained from buying land from the Govt as long as the system of allocation remains opaque, we all know that security clearance and victimisation is part and parcel of the allocation of land under the SPPF/PL Govt.

However Chris, i think that the Opposition will do good to take some of your advice itself, and bring forth evidence of those SPPF/PL who have benefited and is part of the 2.5 billion dollars which they are focussing on. As is they are behaving in the same way as you claim Patrick is.

Vox Dei

Anonymous said...

I reply to Pat X and Vox-

Any Leader in their right mind would open books to allegation of misuse of funds in a democracy.

However, I am not an SNP member. I only gave them a speech in their convention to give them some ideas on what to focus on as we face a great challenge in the economy and national finances. IMF Adminsitration is a serious matter.

Vox, it is true Vivian Soundy resigned as Treasurer. She had her reasons. But this is an SNP matter.

They need to find the courage to handle their affairs as it should be handled.

I believe there is an P.P. politcal conspiracy to tie me to SNP. I am not SNP. In People they say I am now in SNP. In Isola Bella, they say I am working with Ramkalawan.

I work with anyone. Ramkalawan, Mancham, Volcere, Boulle, you name it. I would even give a speech to P.P. in a congress, if they could guarantee my security, which they will not, hence, I will not speak.

Most recently, the have conducted military exercising marching 25 men at 3.00am behind my laundry facility. NDEA is operating on Praslin and State House thugs driving around in the operation. Another effort to instill fear and intimidation, at Christmas time.

I have most recently drafted a Manifesto for a new party. The details have to be ironed out if I come on board.

This is all good an optimistic for a new Seychelles of real democracy, and real opportunity to get out of the mess we are in.

Merry Christmas keep the ideas coming, for it is that, "IDEAS" that have saved man from himself since Adam and Eve on a day to day basis, while waiting for the Lord.

Christopher Gill

Anonymous said...

Chris, you are no more SNP than I am PL. See the problem in Seychelles, the same one I encounter every time I speak in favour of a party or another?

Look forward to see that new party come to life. Who knows, I might even make a donation if convinced that it has the potential to make the difference.

Patrick X

Anonymous said...

Patrick X, I am tired of you castigating Ramkalawan every time you post. Just give it a break.

The man did not bankrupt Seychelles. Albert Rene, James Michel and their forty thieves did.

Ramkalawan did not have a coup d'etat and put Seychelles where it is today, but those 2 power hungry murderers did.

Ramkalawan has not invited Arabs, South Africans, Mauritians, Russians, French, Indians, Irish and Chinese to Seychelles to take our land, our jobs and our dignity. Rene and Michel did.

So let us serious Seychellois and Seychelloise who by the way LIVE IN SEYCHELLES and not overseas fight to take our country back from these killers and murderers who continue to hide behind an army and their guns.

And by the way, when you learn the difference between "advise" and "advice", come back to this blog and join the real Seychellois men and women who are working day and night to give YOU, your children if you have any, your family in Seychelles if you have any, a chance to taste freedom and an opportunity for a better life.

So wherever you are you coward, think of what the likes of Ramkalawan, Annette and Bernard Georges, Mancienne, Volcere, Mancham, Gill, Gerard Hoareau and others have done for our country. Think of Simon Desnousse and Hassan Ali being tortured and brutally murdered at the hands of Albert and Michel's thugs; think of their families who have suffered. But think more about those martyrs who have died so that a coward like you can taste freedom. And then when it has sunk into your small brain, come back here to tell us that the SPPF-Lepep party is the better evil! Yes, they are EVIL alright, but Michel and Rene are 2 cowards who send murderers into the night to kill for them so that they can stay in power and enjoy the wealth they have both stolen from our country and our children and grandchildren. Is this who you want your children to look up to? Is this the party you really want to vote for?

I am proud that we have Seychellois men and women still willing to fight for a better Seychelles and for democracy. We do not want JJ Evil Spirit, let alone his handouts as we are the workers who keep this country afloat. We do not want one rupee land as the Arabs are enjoying from an idiot President who continues to give away the little land our forefathers left us. We do not want to live by guns and bullets. We do not want Irish people running our Police Department while our own people with experience are getting sacked. And we certainly do not want or need French people to come to Seychelles to run PUC while the average Seychellois bills go up so that we can pay their fat salaries and perks.

Enough is enough and the last thing we need is another sucker called Patrick X licking the SPPF's ass and praising them while kicking others who have moved us closer to a true democracy.

For this reason Patrick X, I will give my support and my vote to anyone who can lead us out of this evil empire of Rene and Michel. I truly hope they both burn in hell for all the pain and misery they have caused to the people of our country. History has proven over and over again that evil empires and their leaders always crumble, and that GOOD prevails every time.

So Patrick X, you can remain a coward and join the evil empire and keep them in power or you can become a hero by helping Ramkalawan, Volcere, Mancham, Gill, Boulle or whoever else sticks their necks out for you so that when you return to Seychelles one day, you can smell the air of freedom. Until then, I urge you to write about the real evil in Seychelles. That is, the SPPF camouflaged as Lepep.

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Anonymous said...

Mr Gill

First off, you have no clue to what you are saying. it appears to me that you have no life, and waste what little time you have left on Earth to criticise and complain about things and people that you know shit about.
It is people like you that make this country so hard to live in, with your senseless judgements and annoying criticism that get people no where.
Nobody's perfect, including you, and these people you keep judging are human too. You tarnish the reputation of many people who have not even have had a chance to sin. Maybe Albert has made his mistakes, but that doesnt mean you have to already put his children, some still innocent and young, on this negative pillar to poke at and make fun of. How would you feel, with kids of your own being criticised and judged by your mistakes?
Even so, the old man is retired, just let him live out the rest of his days, without continually talking crap which most of it is a gross exageration. If you want to cary on critisizing, at least write facts instead of false accusations and ridiculous sarcasm.

Anonymous said...

I reply to last comment.

I say it again, I did not write the comments, nor did I do the cartoon.

I do not delve into artistic suppression. I advocate free speech and tolerance. By resorting to cartoons, the artist is tolerating Albert and company. Would you prefer the artist use guns and grenades to get his meeasge home?

This is the magic of Free Speech, it foster peace.

Alberts children are innocent. I have said that over and over again. They cannot be held accountable for this man's misdeeds and failure.

Some of them have even joined Mouvamn Seselwa Rasin (MSR) and we welcome them.

Even his brother in law has joined. We welcome him.

We welcome anyone that wants a better Seychelles then what albert and SPPF PP delivered to us.

Christopher Gill

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